Wednesday, November 5, 2014


Question 2: Abigail Adams
In 1780, Abigail Adams wrote to her son John Quincy Adams while he was overseas with his father, before he became president. In the letter Abigail uses metaphors, logical comparisons, and talks about how John can use his talent out in the world and during difficult times.
Abigail Adams wrote to John in a kind manner rather trying to reprimand him of how he should be using his talents. She said “Your knowledge of language must give you greater advantages.” Which indicates that she knows that he will do well in his trip. She tells him that he has natural talents to build his confidence and help him recognize those talents. Abigail uses the metaphor “older and wiser” which means that his knowledge will grow and become great as he matures.
Abigail uses logical comparison to give John an idea of how he should work and behave during the voyage and throughout his life. The caring mother compares a judicious traveler to a river. She said that even a wise traveler can not find his way through the woods as smoothly as a river can. Adams want her son to be as smooth and fluent as a river. She wants him to know that being fluent and smooth is greater that being wise. She hopes that he will become diligent and mature from this trip.
Adams talk about the difficulties that he will be facing. She gives him solutions on ways to conquer those difficulties with his natural talents. She implies that he is a genius like Licero and that “ the habits of a vigorous mind are formed in contending with difficulties.” Abigail tells him that some of the struggles will be as big as “war, desolation, and tyranny.” But she tells him his talents, especially being articulate in language will allow him to conquer those difficulties and become “Almighty.”
 Abigail Adams wrote to her son John Quincy Adams to help him recognize his gifts. She did not know that John will be something as great as president but she did know that the way he was and raised will guarantee a bright and successful future ahead of him.                    
 

5 comments:

  1. First of all, the introduction paragraph is too short. It does not contain enough background information and the author's purpose of writing this particular speech. The writer constantly uses Abigail Adams in the beginning of every paragraph. This tends to weaken the paragraph and doesn't include a unique opening. The writer showed his or her understanding and interpretation of the letter accurately.

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  2. The essay's introduction does not restate the prompt well and only states the rhetorical devices used in the essay. The rhetorical devices are not stated on how it relates to the essay and is listed. The writer is repetitive and need to elaborate more on the devices and the analysis. The essay gets stronger towards the middle but later gets weak again towards the end. The writer showed his understanding of the letter but there is a need to be more detailed and more specific, then this essay could reach the score of a 9.

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  3. The introduction to the essay is merely two sentences and not at all interesting enough to grab the reader's attention. More historical background is needed to help convey your view. And you didn't really analyze how Abigail uses the rhetorical devices to persuade John Adams. Your citations are also a bit too vague and doesn't support your thesis as much since there is lack of an analysis.

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  4. The writer does not provide sufficient amount of historical context In the first paragraph. I would suggest the writer to add more detail when he introduces the rhetorical devices. Adding specific details to these rhetorical devices can enhance the essay. The writer uses sophisticated vocabulary while analyzing his citations effectively. He shows that he understands the prompt. When the writer mentions that Adams wanted her son to know that being wise isn't the only factor. The son can be fluent and smooth as well. This is is a strong argument.

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  5. The writer does a poor job while constructing his introductory paragraph and fails to add historical background to grasp the readers attention. Avoid merely just listing the rhetorical devices used, but be more specific. You could've elaborated more on your analysis to create a stronger point.

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